Saturday, September 15, 2012
Keep Moving Forward
When your entire life is changed, your down in the dumps, you can't stop crying, and you don't know where to turn... Remember all those dreams your pushed into the back of your head. Throw them into the light, grab everyone who is still there right by your side, and keep moving forward. That's when you really know what you're made of, don't take anyone's bullshit anymore, stirve for YOU and YOUR dreams. Then when you are sitting on your throne, remember to thank the ones who gave you that push when you needed it and tell them that you love them. <3
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Graham, Keenan, Men?
The Graham story:
We went on our date. We went to lunch instead. Then went to dave and busters. Then a movie. I was good, he's cute and sweet. It was nice. We also went to lunch at the OG on tuesday. Then he came and spent the night.
That's where my mind is having issues. I like the kid, he seems nice, clearly can't respect my wishes of not wanting to have sex. Which actually royally hurts my feelings. Why can't someone just respect what I want. I'm glad he went to NY for the rest of the week so I can clear my head. I like him, as a person. But I don't think I like him as more than that. ughh...
Keenan has to reschedule our date tonight because he forgot he made plans before for the football game tonight.
Want to know how much I miss Nathan right now? A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT!
We went on our date. We went to lunch instead. Then went to dave and busters. Then a movie. I was good, he's cute and sweet. It was nice. We also went to lunch at the OG on tuesday. Then he came and spent the night.
That's where my mind is having issues. I like the kid, he seems nice, clearly can't respect my wishes of not wanting to have sex. Which actually royally hurts my feelings. Why can't someone just respect what I want. I'm glad he went to NY for the rest of the week so I can clear my head. I like him, as a person. But I don't think I like him as more than that. ughh...
Keenan has to reschedule our date tonight because he forgot he made plans before for the football game tonight.
Want to know how much I miss Nathan right now? A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT!
Monday, September 10, 2012
Postsecret Sunday (3)
There is 3 people I would say i've had INCREDIBLE sex with. Nate, Kyle, and Keenan. Mind blowing!!!!! I was also in love with nate and kyle, 100% NOT keenan.
Let's play catch up because my brain hurts lol
Thursday last week I hung out with the old friends since puddin was in town, didn't stay long though. I went over to B's. Had some really great sex and went home. Uhh yeah that has to stay on SERIOUS downlow! (see previous post's)
This thursday I started talking to Keenan again Mr. KID. Went to the cowboy for a few drinks then went there to hang out. Well hanging out didn't last long. Again (bad me i know) had some wonderful sex, and by wonderful I mean my arms and shoulders were sore as a MOFO because of how much moving and holding and everything I was doing!!! OMFG it was great... umm wait.. condom broke? What?! We had sex a lot, though. So then I work friday night and when I got off I went over to K's again. We watched some of a movie, the start of the OC and hung out with his roommate travis and his girl Roxy. We joked, and danced around to music and sang and laughed. Then we went to bed and cuddled and kissed and went to sleep! It was great! I half-assed got ready for work in the morning and he proceeded to tell me that I was beautiful. I then, before work went and got a plan B pill. It's 50 god damn dollars! I can't believe he keeps telling me hoe beautiful I am. He's NUTS! lol! I kind of like him, but i'm not trying to get hurt. We will see how this goes I suppose.
TONIGHT... Josh V came into my work, gave me a hug hi talked a tiny bit and gave me a hug bye. He is hott as hell, have a lot in common and ais such a prick more often than not. Also, This kid Graham came into my work. I went to HS with him, we talked a little and I gave him my number. We are going to grab coffee in the morning. He also just got divorced and has a little girl. I think it will be nice gaining some new friends.
Side Note: WTF is happening in my life right now!? My head is spinning!
This thursday I started talking to Keenan again Mr. KID. Went to the cowboy for a few drinks then went there to hang out. Well hanging out didn't last long. Again (bad me i know) had some wonderful sex, and by wonderful I mean my arms and shoulders were sore as a MOFO because of how much moving and holding and everything I was doing!!! OMFG it was great... umm wait.. condom broke? What?! We had sex a lot, though. So then I work friday night and when I got off I went over to K's again. We watched some of a movie, the start of the OC and hung out with his roommate travis and his girl Roxy. We joked, and danced around to music and sang and laughed. Then we went to bed and cuddled and kissed and went to sleep! It was great! I half-assed got ready for work in the morning and he proceeded to tell me that I was beautiful. I then, before work went and got a plan B pill. It's 50 god damn dollars! I can't believe he keeps telling me hoe beautiful I am. He's NUTS! lol! I kind of like him, but i'm not trying to get hurt. We will see how this goes I suppose.
TONIGHT... Josh V came into my work, gave me a hug hi talked a tiny bit and gave me a hug bye. He is hott as hell, have a lot in common and ais such a prick more often than not. Also, This kid Graham came into my work. I went to HS with him, we talked a little and I gave him my number. We are going to grab coffee in the morning. He also just got divorced and has a little girl. I think it will be nice gaining some new friends.
Side Note: WTF is happening in my life right now!? My head is spinning!
Friday, September 7, 2012
We can't talk anymore
Becca text JW and told him that we can't hang out anymore, not like we had been. (At this point maybe we can't talk!) I refuse to be the girl who is the "reason" someone breaks up. Even if it's not really me. That's not fair to anyone and I don't want to be that person anymore. PERIOD. JW needs to break up with his girl on his own. So that's that!
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Delicious
Oh B,
You look ridiculously gorgeous in PJ's!!!
You are also a super big prick sometimes na dI just want to bitch slap you and tell you to get a grip and lighten up!
You look ridiculously gorgeous in PJ's!!!
You are also a super big prick sometimes na dI just want to bitch slap you and tell you to get a grip and lighten up!
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
4200 texts in 5 months....
I can't sleep and I should really delete these texts, but I'm reading them first.
Trav is the only person I dont delete texts from. IDK why. But here is some of the funny shit we say to each other:
March 10 -
B(Me)- SO I am in a really good mood.
T - Good, I'm happy for you
B - But see that's the problem, I have nothing to do and no one to hang out with so it's kind of a waste. Lol
T - Bad timing haha
T- You can wash my car... that will be fun.
B - You can kiss my ass, that'll be fun too!
T - Me kissing your ass?
B - Yeah it'll go hand in hand with me washing your car, can you hear the sarcasm?
March 10
B - I'm epic is sexcapades!
(wtf... haha)
March 10
B - Lies, you slut!
T - You're a slut, slut face.
B - You love me and my face
T - you think so?
B - YOU LOVE MY MOTHER FUCKING FACE!
T - Haha i'm going to bed
B - Okay doll, love you. Let me know when you're free tomorrow
(We are random as hell)
March 23
B - Just be here for me I need it
T - I'm here
(Kid kept me sane through my break up)
March 25
T - You're a slutty mcslutty the sac tapping slut. You tapped 3 sacs last night, all for a cup cake
(They wouldn't let me have one, revenge was taken out on my car... they cupcaked it)
March 26
B - If you say it's about Vanessa I will bitch slap you back to reality!
(about a FB post)
April 11
T - Movie?
B - Duh! when?
T - let me look, chipotle!
B - eat there or at the movie?
T - MOVIE! It's tradition!
(I love our dates!)
April 16
B - Thank you for being such a incredibly respectful amazing man
T - Did I do something?
B - No, just thanking you for being you.
(this was after spending a few days with him in the hospital, I was super nice and saw him and helped him a bit, DUH hes my best!)
April 18
B - Tell me something nice
T - You're the best person I know
April 25
B - I miss you
T - What brought that on?
B - Nothing just making a statment
T - I kinda sorta miss you too
B - Kinda sorta?
T - take it or leave it
B- I'll take it
T- I don't miss people often
B - Except me
T - Kinda sorta
May 4
B - I'm sick of being so disrespected for this all and i'm sick of feeling like such a horrible person
T - I see... I has a speech for you this morning... But I forgot what I wasgoing to say
B - Lmao and this is why I love you
May 4
T - May the 4th be with you!
May 5
T - KIT
B - KIT???
T - keep in touch
B - Oh, you're so lame haha
T - Quiet bitch, i'll cut you
(hahahaha)
May 16
T - Nut up or shut up
B - God i'm acting like brandon... a little bitch!
T - Pretty much
May 16
T - This is the girl i'm interested in *Insert pic*
B - Is she 14?!?!?!
T - 25 actually
B - Shut the fuck up! DID YOU CHECK HER ID???
(LMFAO!)
May 30
B - I may or may not be eating spongebob easy mac
T - You're easier than easy mac
B - Brat!
June 2
T - Whats wrong
B - If this chick next to me says Bro one more time i'm going to punch her!
T - Hahahaha do it!
June 8
B - New Becca
T - Improved Becca
B - Thanks!
T - It's called wisdom, it comes from being damaged.
June 13
B - *bang*
T - Huh?
B - That's me shooting myself
T - What? No Thud?
June 16
B - This chick better get my approval because I don't feel like adding more bitches to my hit list!
(about a new girl T was dating)
June 22
B - How's life fucktard?
T - You're my only complaint
B - Ouch
T - Haha
June 23
T - Hows the place?
B - Looks like shit on the outside, nice as hell on the inside
T - Are you explaining you?
B - Fuck you i'm gorgeous!!!!!!!!!
(about my new home)
June 26 (trav hinting my secrets on our group chat)
B - I will murder you like a crazy ex girlfriend if you EVER hint about that again!
T - I like how you know I was giggling!
B - I know you far too well
June 29
T - You should kick friday in the crotch
B - If it hs one I would, then slap it's ass for good measure
T - Haha Get it bitch!
June 30
B - You've got a comfy bed
T - That's fucked up
B - MMM So warm
T - I hate you
B - So Fluffy
T - Fuck off
B - So blue!!!!!!!!!!!!
T - Not helping
(I took a nap at his place without him there haha)
July 1
T - I hate you
B - I love you too
July 25
T - You know what you need?
B - Whats that?
T - A chimichana, or just say it. It's fun to say
Aug 2
T - I don't love you. I merely keep you around because you know too much!
Trav is the only person I dont delete texts from. IDK why. But here is some of the funny shit we say to each other:
March 10 -
B(Me)- SO I am in a really good mood.
T - Good, I'm happy for you
B - But see that's the problem, I have nothing to do and no one to hang out with so it's kind of a waste. Lol
T - Bad timing haha
T- You can wash my car... that will be fun.
B - You can kiss my ass, that'll be fun too!
T - Me kissing your ass?
B - Yeah it'll go hand in hand with me washing your car, can you hear the sarcasm?
March 10
B - I'm epic is sexcapades!
(wtf... haha)
March 10
B - Lies, you slut!
T - You're a slut, slut face.
B - You love me and my face
T - you think so?
B - YOU LOVE MY MOTHER FUCKING FACE!
T - Haha i'm going to bed
B - Okay doll, love you. Let me know when you're free tomorrow
(We are random as hell)
March 23
B - Just be here for me I need it
T - I'm here
(Kid kept me sane through my break up)
March 25
T - You're a slutty mcslutty the sac tapping slut. You tapped 3 sacs last night, all for a cup cake
(They wouldn't let me have one, revenge was taken out on my car... they cupcaked it)
March 26
B - If you say it's about Vanessa I will bitch slap you back to reality!
(about a FB post)
April 11
T - Movie?
B - Duh! when?
T - let me look, chipotle!
B - eat there or at the movie?
T - MOVIE! It's tradition!
(I love our dates!)
April 16
B - Thank you for being such a incredibly respectful amazing man
T - Did I do something?
B - No, just thanking you for being you.
(this was after spending a few days with him in the hospital, I was super nice and saw him and helped him a bit, DUH hes my best!)
April 18
B - Tell me something nice
T - You're the best person I know
April 25
B - I miss you
T - What brought that on?
B - Nothing just making a statment
T - I kinda sorta miss you too
B - Kinda sorta?
T - take it or leave it
B- I'll take it
T- I don't miss people often
B - Except me
T - Kinda sorta
May 4
B - I'm sick of being so disrespected for this all and i'm sick of feeling like such a horrible person
T - I see... I has a speech for you this morning... But I forgot what I wasgoing to say
B - Lmao and this is why I love you
May 4
T - May the 4th be with you!
May 5
T - KIT
B - KIT???
T - keep in touch
B - Oh, you're so lame haha
T - Quiet bitch, i'll cut you
(hahahaha)
May 16
T - Nut up or shut up
B - God i'm acting like brandon... a little bitch!
T - Pretty much
May 16
T - This is the girl i'm interested in *Insert pic*
B - Is she 14?!?!?!
T - 25 actually
B - Shut the fuck up! DID YOU CHECK HER ID???
(LMFAO!)
May 30
B - I may or may not be eating spongebob easy mac
T - You're easier than easy mac
B - Brat!
June 2
T - Whats wrong
B - If this chick next to me says Bro one more time i'm going to punch her!
T - Hahahaha do it!
June 8
B - New Becca
T - Improved Becca
B - Thanks!
T - It's called wisdom, it comes from being damaged.
June 13
B - *bang*
T - Huh?
B - That's me shooting myself
T - What? No Thud?
June 16
B - This chick better get my approval because I don't feel like adding more bitches to my hit list!
(about a new girl T was dating)
June 22
B - How's life fucktard?
T - You're my only complaint
B - Ouch
T - Haha
June 23
T - Hows the place?
B - Looks like shit on the outside, nice as hell on the inside
T - Are you explaining you?
B - Fuck you i'm gorgeous!!!!!!!!!
(about my new home)
June 26 (trav hinting my secrets on our group chat)
B - I will murder you like a crazy ex girlfriend if you EVER hint about that again!
T - I like how you know I was giggling!
B - I know you far too well
June 29
T - You should kick friday in the crotch
B - If it hs one I would, then slap it's ass for good measure
T - Haha Get it bitch!
June 30
B - You've got a comfy bed
T - That's fucked up
B - MMM So warm
T - I hate you
B - So Fluffy
T - Fuck off
B - So blue!!!!!!!!!!!!
T - Not helping
(I took a nap at his place without him there haha)
July 1
T - I hate you
B - I love you too
July 25
T - You know what you need?
B - Whats that?
T - A chimichana, or just say it. It's fun to say
Aug 2
T - I don't love you. I merely keep you around because you know too much!
Postsecret Monday? (2)
I forgot to do my secret sunday so i'll so secret monday.
Whats a good one?
People keep telling me i'm gorgeous/pretty/stunning lately. I say thank you and it makes me smile but I don't feel like it's a meaningful thing. I want someone to look me in the eyes and care about me and lovingly tell me i'm gorgeous. I miss the true feeling of someone thinking that and FEELING that.
Whats a good one?
People keep telling me i'm gorgeous/pretty/stunning lately. I say thank you and it makes me smile but I don't feel like it's a meaningful thing. I want someone to look me in the eyes and care about me and lovingly tell me i'm gorgeous. I miss the true feeling of someone thinking that and FEELING that.
Needing Some Consistency!
MY life has been a hot friggen mess lately.
1 job, got fired, found 2 jobs in a week and a half. A few days ago one of them ended. They are stupid and agreed on a schedule with me then flipped shit when they wanted me to work other times and I wouldn't.
Men - ughh
Friends - I have been seeing them randomly lately. I love it but hate it at the same time.
This post is going to be as random as my life has been lately okay?
Somehow I managed to lose my ID the other night. Turns out in the shuffle of clothes coming off it fell out of my pocket at brandons. I need to go pick that up on wednesday when I have some time.
IDK why I really like Josh, it's kind of annoying because he's a prick and I know this. I am also looking forward to our date that will hopefully happen on sat. :)
I spent some time with Brian and Cara yesterday. Got off from working a double and drank wine until 6am with them. Having serious talks with Bri while drunk.. not good. Lol I dont remember the last hour-ish of that convo. I love those two though.
Did I mention I had a baby melt down on 8/28? Since it was supposed to be my 3 year marriage anniversary? No? Oh well I did. I'm proud of myself though. I didn't cave in. I haven't spoken to Nate in at least a month now.
I'm so fucking broke. I can finally start making tips tomorrow, I hope I make a lot of money because I AM SO FUCKING BROKE.
My brain hurts, night!
1 job, got fired, found 2 jobs in a week and a half. A few days ago one of them ended. They are stupid and agreed on a schedule with me then flipped shit when they wanted me to work other times and I wouldn't.
Men - ughh
Friends - I have been seeing them randomly lately. I love it but hate it at the same time.
This post is going to be as random as my life has been lately okay?
Somehow I managed to lose my ID the other night. Turns out in the shuffle of clothes coming off it fell out of my pocket at brandons. I need to go pick that up on wednesday when I have some time.
IDK why I really like Josh, it's kind of annoying because he's a prick and I know this. I am also looking forward to our date that will hopefully happen on sat. :)
I spent some time with Brian and Cara yesterday. Got off from working a double and drank wine until 6am with them. Having serious talks with Bri while drunk.. not good. Lol I dont remember the last hour-ish of that convo. I love those two though.
Did I mention I had a baby melt down on 8/28? Since it was supposed to be my 3 year marriage anniversary? No? Oh well I did. I'm proud of myself though. I didn't cave in. I haven't spoken to Nate in at least a month now.
I'm so fucking broke. I can finally start making tips tomorrow, I hope I make a lot of money because I AM SO FUCKING BROKE.
My brain hurts, night!
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